You Know, I have learned one thing in my life, That is having your parents with you is the best thing you can ever have. That love and compassion cannot be replaced with anything. So God cannot be present everywhere, so, he created mothers! You lose your mother- Exactly it feels like you literally lose your world!
It’s a Big time to appreciate what we have and how lucky you are to have them in your life.
This article today I’m writing just to express my thoughts and view towards how exactly it feels life without mom, I know, It’s hard to convince yourself to move on because your attachment with your mother and the memory you shared cannot be replaced with anything.
If I was overwhelmed by the insecurities of young adulthood, she served as my rock and confidence. My Mother and I were interwoven, two threads running through the same stitch, navigating tragedies of life together. When she died five years back, I felt betrayed but began to search for meaning.
While there are moments when I feel stranded and abandoned, terrified of the unknown future, I am beginning to uncover lessons that she left behind. This is what I’ve learned from my mother and through her death thus far.
If You Don’t like something, own it.
When we let go of shame and our fear of judgment, we free ourselves to do what we want.
After my mom finished her last round of dialysis, she made a vow to stop worrying as much about others thoughts. From there on out, she did what she wanted.
Life is too short to do things for approval or to avoid conflict. If you don’t like where you are, get up and leave. If you don’t like what the waiter brought you, order something else. If you aren’t happy with what someone says, respectfully let them know. You must be your own advocate.
The most honest I am, the more I love. I have a difficult time being honest when I feel negative and vulnerable. Since my mother’s death, I practice expressing myself even if another’s responses isn’t what I imagine. If it goes well, I only feel closer to the person I am honest with. If we don’t see eye to eye, then I feel closer and stronger within myself.
Be Willing To Spend Money On Experiences:-
My Mother and Her family grew up extremely poor. They immigrated to other state and lived in my grandfather’s assigned house, squeezing five people into the tiny house attached to shop.
Despite her childhood poverty, instead of gripping onto money earned, she believed in spending to create an incredible experience. She always paid for friends to join for family events and dinners, in order to include all who were important to me.
Dining out at different restaurants was one of her pleasure, and she told each guest to order whatever they wanted. She believed that good quality food meant good quality life. She planned wild trips to other places and made sure to include strange excursions so that the memories would live with us.
Don’t worry about saving every penny. I believe that if you have the means to let go, then let go. There’s nothing like sharing laughter with a friend over a good meal or the adventure of taking a last minute road trip to a nearby state. If you have the money and you can afford to relax with it, spend it. Spend it, because you can’t take it with you to the grave.
Your Story And Talent Are Needed:-
My mother’s friends call me to confess how amazed they were by her willingness to help. Even if you think your experience isn’t valuable, it is. My mother never felt like she knew or accomplished enough, but she used all her life experience and knowledge to help people. You never know when you give will be returned. Because of all of the support my mom gave, I have an international community of people who want to support me.
There is always a friend or acquaintance who can benefit from your support or someone who wants to know that another person has forgotten what they’re going through now. Don’t remain silent. Share your self and recognize the value in your individuality.
Find A Little Things To Be Grateful For In Each Moment:-
After my mom died, many of my illusions and fantasies were shattered. I realized how disconnected from reality, I could be, absorbed in my world of false fear and anxieties.
This single moment is all there is to live. Longing for the future or the past is indulging a mental fantasy.
Find the best thing in each moment even if it’s small. Recognize at least one thing that you are grateful for in order to practice bringing yourself back to where you are. This will help to feel the joy in the mundane and the preciousness in the practicalities of life.
Do Not Take Unnecessary Advice Everyone Gives You:-
Try not to let the common sense or” better sense” of others confuse your own intuition. Gather opinions if you are uncertain about a decision, but return back to your own internal guidance system. Allow others’ advice to help strengthen your intuition by tossing out what doesn’t resonate and hold onto what does. This will help you get clear about what is really true for you.
You’re Never Too Old To Try Something New:-
My mom constantly wanted to know learn and to be more. She wanted to be a singer and fulfilled this by singing Wherever she gets a chance to sing. I believe that it’s best to narrow down what is most important to you to accomplish. Some of us have a list of things we want to master, but it’s best, to begin with, one goal and to give your consistent attention.
There is something admirable about committing and seeing something to the end. Try not to give up halfway if it gets tough. Like my mother, push on until you get what you looking for, but don’t ever tell yourself it’s too late to step into the dream.