How I Finally Moved On From My “Non-Relationship”

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”I searched for years I found no love. I’m sure that love will never be a product of plasticity.”

Ending a relationship can be incredibly difficult no matter how toxic it is. Part of this is for simple biological reasons, as some scientific studies have shown that being in love activates the same areas of the brain as being high on cocaine.

Brain scans of lovers and people experiencing cocaine addiction both displays increased activity in the pleasure centers of the brain (most notably the dopamine centers) and decreased activity in the frontal lobe, which is the area responsible for cognition. This means that while falling in love can make us feel good, it can also profoundly affect our judgment.

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It is for this reason that love can sometimes be compared to an addiction. In love, much like an addiction, there may be negative side effects such as abuse or gaslighting. But despite all of those bad circumstances, it can still be difficult to kick the romantic attraction and feelings of love.

If you find yourself feeling trapped in a relationship you know is not healthy, consider these tips for letting go of it for good:

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1. Trust In Your Emotions: If you are feeling, more times than not, insecure and ill at ease about your relationship, you need to pay attention to this perception. You are not overly sensitive, insecure, needy, and irrational all of the time. People tend to tell themselves these things so as to push their negative emotions away and avoid confronting the possibility that a relationship may not be sustainable. Instead of criticizing yourself for your feelings, take them seriously and try to directly talk with your partner. If your partner habitually dismisses you, rejects you or turns the tables by blaming you for your feelings, this is an indicator that this relationship may simply not be workable. Manipulation through guilting you, telling you are overly sensitive, needy and turning the tables are key signs of a toxic union.

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2. Trust In Reliability: The basis of healthy love and friendship is believing people are going to do what they say they are going to do. It means something if your partner often leaves you hanging, shows up late or doesn’t show up at all. We all have off days or events come up that are out of our control, but most of the time your partner should be reliable. If you live with anxiety about what’s going to happen next or whether he/she is going to let you down, there is a major issue in your relationship. If you live off small crusts and crumbs of pleasure with your partner, then consider that this relationship may not have enough sustenance to keep you happy and healthy.

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3. Trust In Intuition: Have you ever had a hunch about someone but then talked yourself out of it, only to later have your original hunch confirmed? So often when partnering up we want so badly to believe in a person or in love that we dismiss our intuition. We know something is off or not quite right about our new partner but choose to ignore or push away these insights in favor of getting swept up in romantic love. Sometimes people push their intuition away for years or even marry, only to eventually have it all come crashing down when they can no longer ignore what they have always known to be true. When you have a hunch that something is off with your partner, talk with him or her about it, but when you continue to have the same sense that something’s not quite right, don’t push your instincts away. Your intuition is telling you that this particular person may be a lemon and that it is time to discard.

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4. Trust In Your Experiences: It means something important when most of the time you’re around your partner you feel ill at ease, uncomfortable or worried about tripping a switch to a fight. For things to be going well in your relationship, most of the time you should feel safe, at ease and comfortable with your partner and with bringing him/her around your friends and family. Remember when things start off poorly, they are unlikely to improve with time and hard work.

 

5. Trust Insecurity: Take full notice that you have a major issue if you feel insecure most of the time about how your romantic love feels about you or about what their level of commitment is to you. It’s not your fault when this insecurity wells up. Talk with your love about your feelings, your worries, your concerns and see if you feel better after this talk. You may have things you need to work on as an individual, but you should be able to talk with your partner about these things. Once your partner knows what the buttons are that make you insecure, he/she should not continue to push them. You should feel safe and secure with your love, not worried about if you are going to feel insecure in their presence.

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”If You Make Us Feel Invincible, We’ll Make You Feel Beautiful.”

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”If you love someone, set them free”

Whether you are a man or a woman reading this article, this will give you greater clarity in yourself/partner and what your/their needs are in your intimate relationship.

Let’s put an end to the needless fighting due to miscommunication, the unnecessary sex-less nights, and the verbal shut-downs.

Read through these tips and I promise you’ll never see your relationship through the same lens again.

Open any beauty magazine and you’ll see article upon article about what women want in relationships and how to get it. But there’s rarely space for men to express their relationship needs. And women need to know. So let’s create that space. Here. Now. Maybe it can be the first domino to start a conversation. You may or may not agree with these. What’s more important is that we talk about it. The following are based on my sessions coaching thousands of men on and offline as well as my own wants.

To feel like your hero:-

We don’t want to be your Clark Kent. We want to be your Superman. We want you to see us as leaping tall buildings in a single bound and catching bullets. Not pushing a mail cart and asking you if we can buy sugar cereal < — Or at least feel that way. And I know it’s our job to get there, not yours. But nothing gives us more strength than a woman who creates a space that makes us feel invincible. If you make us feel invincible, we’ll make you feel beautiful. And of course, you want to feel invincible too and we want to feel beautiful as well. But for men, our invincible is your beauty.

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Acceptance:-

There’s a new T-shirt trending Los Angeles titled “Love Me Anyways.” They should make them for men. Because we need to feel that when we stack the dishes in the dishwasher like a five-year-old, say the wrong thing in front of your friends, leave the toilet seat up, get too logical, forget something you’ve said a thousand times, that you love us anyway. Because inside every man is a boy who forgets he’s a man sometimes. And every boy gets into things, not because he’s bad but because he’s got a curious mind and a short attention span.

Unconditional support from our woman is what will snap us out of our boyish behavior and inject us with a desire to be a stronger man. Only when you accept us as we are, who we are, will we want to become someone better.

Not to be left in the dark:-

So many women don’t tell their men how they feel because they don’t want to rock the boat. Or they’re afraid. The truth is when you don’t express yourself, you leave us in the dark. You’re not doing life with us. You’re doing life around us. We don’t really know the truth of you. You are prepackaging and presenting parts of your life instead of doing your whole life with us. This creates a crowbar, not glue.

Couples grow and get stronger overcoming adversity, not by doing life separately. Know that every time you hold things in, you are building walls inside the sacred space of the relationship. No, we don’t want you to verbally vomit on us. But believe it or not, we really do want to know how you feel.

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Blinders sex is about connection:-

There’s sex. Then there’s blinders sex, the kind of sex that gives you blinders, keeps your eyes forward and intentions straight when you’re out in the world. Let’s face it. Men are going to look. They’re like squirrels. They get distracted by shiny things. But there’s a difference between noticing and wanting. We’re visual creatures. We notice shiny things. But blinder sex gets us to say, “Yeah, she may be pretty but I would never trade in what I have for anything else.”

Blinders sex isn’t just good sex. It’s an authentic deep connection with someone that makes you fantasize about them in the shower, call in sick so you can lie in bed all day making love and eating Oreos. It produces an experience that cannot happen with anyone else. That’s why it gives us blinders. Blinders sex is about connection. Not sex.

The C-word:-

Communication. Without it, relationships are built on sand. We want you to communicate directly. We don’t get clues. We need things spelled out. We are logical creatures. And we understand that if you have to spell it out, it’s not the same. You don’t want us to do the dishes. You want us to want to do the dishes. We get it. OK, then tell us. Explain. Model how you would like us to communicate back.

For many of us, communication is not our specialty. We need some guidance. Generally speaking, men tend to pull from a logical place. Women pull from an emotional place. If you can meet us at logic, we will match your emotions.

Sweat:-

There’s nothing sexier than working out with your intimate partner. Watching you sweat and work on your body only encourages us to work on ours as well. We get to see the raw and real you, a different type of naked. Now, if we do this together, we’re in the act of building something, a lifestyle. We’re not just talking. We’re doing. And that’s hot. We need to sweat and we would like it if you joined us.

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Mandates:-

There is something we get from our boys (male friends) that we just can’t get from you. And there’s nothing you can do to give us that because it’s a relationship dynamic, a comradery that men have with men. You have the same when you go dancing with your girlfriends. And it doesn’t mean we want to be with them more. It’s apples and oranges. It fulfills a different part of us. And it refuels us and wants to be with you more. It’s life balance. It’s also going to sharpen us and make us better men, assuming our boys are not boys but real men.

To have our own lives:-

We may not say it, because how do you tell the person you love to get a life? But we really want you to have your own life. Really. We want you to have your own set of friends, activities, and passions. Of course, we want to be supportive of everything you care about and be a part of anything you would like us to be a part of, but we want you to have your own identity.

Because if you have nothing that is yours, our relationship is standing on one leg. Also, if you have your own life, it forces us to get our own lives as well or risk losing you. Forget legs. Let’s put our relationship on wheels. One is yours. One is mine. And together, we’ll ride.

” Admit Your Role In A Failed Relationship ” Without Blaming …

James R. Eads http:/www.tuttartpitturasculturapoesiamusica.com;

”Blaming and shaming are like a cancer in a relationship. If they are allowed to live and spread, the entire relationship can slowly wither away and die.”

When it comes to placing blame in a relationship, it’s almost always easier to see the faults in our partner than in ourselves. One of the problems with couples pointing fingers is that usually both parties are right, and both are wrong. Every person is full of flaws and certain ways that we attempt to defend ourselves that push us away from other people. These self-protective defenses come out even stronger when we get close to someone, and old feelings start to get triggered in us in ways we don’t necessarily expect and aren’t entirely conscious of.

The many ways we get hurt throughout our lives help shape our defenses. Negative past experiences, particularly those from our childhood, leave us on guard as adults. Our defenses may warn us not to trust or open ourselves up to someone else. Or they may tell us to cling on for dear life, because we may be abandoned at any minute. The key to thriving in a relationship is getting to know and challenge our own defenses. Instead of focusing all our attention on our partner’s flaws, it’s important to look at our own limitations. How am I reacting to my partner? Am I misperceiving him/her through the filter of my “critical inner voice?” Am I projecting negative characteristics of my early caretakers onto him/her?

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In improving any relationship, the focus should always be on empowering yourself. You can only change your part in the equation, but that gives you a lot of power. So what can you do to take charge and change the behaviors that are holding you back from getting closer? How can you take actions that will sustain passion, love, and respect in your relationship?

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Don’t build a case :-When a conflict arises, it’s easy to fuel the fire with all kinds of proof of our partner’s character flaws. One morning of forgetting to take out the trash can build into a full-blown criminal case proving our partner guilty of insufferable laziness. We may start cataloging every incident in which he or she forgot to do this or that. Case-building is a huge problem in any relationship. Once we start to see our partner a certain way, we often start perceiving (or misperceiving) their actions through a negative filter. We may start interpreting innocent comments as critical or casual behaviors as rejecting. In these cases, we can either feed our feelings of blame or try to keep a more balanced perspective about what’s going on. Again, we should try to recognize if and when we might be projecting onto our partner or acting on harmful, yet familiar patterns from our past.

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Drop It :-Once the blame starts going back and forth and escalating out of control, it becomes almost impossible to resolve who did what or who’s at fault. The truth is, there is never a winner in these arguments. “You may win the battle, but you will lose the war.” Keep perspective on what’s important. If your goal is really to be close again, then sometimes it’s worth just dropping the past, putting down your guard, and simply being nice to each other. Unilateral disarmament can be a first step to getting back the easy and loving flow of feelings between you and your partner. This is different from glossing over or denying your problems. It’s a matter of dropping your own reactive defenses and stopping the blame game. Ultimately, you will be able to have an honest, adult discussion, where you are open to giving and receiving feedback from a compassionate and calm place.

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Calm yourself down :-Relationships trigger us in ways we rarely expect. Many things can set us off, especially when defenses are at work. A partner’s bad mood or withholding attitude can throw us back into a primal state, particularly when it reminds us of painful dynamics from our past. Though, in the moment, our instinct may be to fight fire with fire, this clearly won’t resolve the problem. When we feel triggered, we should focus on relaxing before reacting. We can better manage our partner’s temper by calming ourselves down first, then approaching them. Issues will always arise between two, independent-minded people, and it’s easy to get critical of someone who we know well enough to witness their weaknesses. When trouble starts brewing, expect the rush of critical thoughts to come into your head, roaring through like a passing train. Then, know that you can decide whether or not to jump on the train.

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Reflect on your patterns :-Once we’ve calmed down and stepped away from a heated situation with our partner, we can start to reflect. When we get triggered, it’s important to take notice of the moment and ask why. Does my reaction seem like an overreaction? Could it have anything to do with my past? Look for the thing you hate the most that your partner does and ask yourself what you do right before that.

We can think about what sets us off and what patterns are at play in our relationships. In doing so, we can accept that every couple is just two people with two sovereign minds and two stories that made us who we are today. We can have respect for those differences and compassion when confronting each other’s defenses.

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Have compassion :-As we start to identify our defenses as well as those of our partner, we get to know them better and to understand why they are the way they are. When we understand the reasons why we both get triggered, we have more compassion for ourselves and our partner. We can further foster compassion by always aiming to see the scenario from our partner’s eyes and understand how they view the situation. We can adopt an empathetic perspective toward what they perceived, even if they weren’t entirely accurate in their perceptions. As an exercise, when our partner tells us how they feel, we should try to play back what they communicate to us to show that we understand how they’re feeling and to see if we have it right. If we can align our state with theirs, we are essentially on the same team sharing the same goal of getting closer in the end.

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Be open to feedback :-As we start a dialogue, it’s essential that we are open to what our partner has to say. Feedback is not something dangerous that we ought to avoid. As an adult, we cannot be crushed or devastated by feedback. Rather, it can be a gift that challenges us to live honestly and that opens us up to the possibility for real change. Don’t be defensive when your partner gives you feedback. Look for the kernel of truth in what they’re saying, as it can benefit you far more than arguing every detail.

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Communicate what you felt:- Once we are calm and we’ve given our partner the chance to express their perceptions, we can explain how we felt without placing blame or feeling victimized. We can offer feedback ourselves in a way that is direct, yet compassionate. It’s important to communicate how we feel in our interactions without acting like we are being wronged. We should avoid using victimized language or making generalized statements. For example, rather than saying, “You made me feel terrible when you forgot to call me. What were you even doing? You ruined my whole night. You always disappoint me,” you could say, “I noticed that I started feeling insecure when you didn’t call me. I think I tend to use those situations to feel bad about myself. I’d like to work on feeling more secure in myself. And it would mean something to me for you to make an effort to stay in touch.”

Once we start to see patterns in ourselves, we can challenge ourselves to act in ways we respect and repair when we make a mistake. When we act out based on our defenses, we should apologize directly to our partner. When we stop placing blame, we shift our focus inward. We can start to differentiate from destructive behaviors we’ve adopted by identifying them, understanding where they come from, and acting differently in the situation. By laying down our arms and taking power over ourselves, we give our relationship its best chance of remaining equal, passionate, and fulfilling.

”Speak When You Are Angry And You’ll Make The Best Speech You’ll Ever Regret”

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”You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.”

Buddha

Anger is an energy – a physical, the bodily energy that expresses itself through body language and through verbal language. And, as you’ve probably experienced yourself, it can get away from you and cause you to make mistakes that will haunt you for years.

When anger takes over, your “choice” mechanism takes the back seat as anger follows its raging path, like flooding, churning river.

“Anyone can become angry – that is easy. But to be angry with the right person at the right time, and for the right purpose and in right way – that is not within everyone’s power and that is not easy.

Anger – until interrupted and channelled – wreaks havoc. It swells its banks. It power-hoses our bodies with adrenaline for a fight, and for men especially, there is a jolt of joy in this ancient warrior energy.

 

“Speak when you are angry and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret”.

But while this physical joy is temporary, the blowback is often permanent.

That is why most wisdom traditions caution us that anger hurts us more than the external object of our anger. In the words of the Buddha, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned”.

The path of personal evolution, from destructive impulses into a life of awakened choices, is not a path of repression or shame or burying sometimes abusive emotions such as anger. But rather, it is the patient practice of transmuting them, through our heart and mind, into energies that serve our highest goals.

Both ancient wisdom traditions and modern psychology offer a number of simple actions you can take to ensure that the passing heat of anger doesn’t burn you forever.

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“He is a fool who cannot be angry; but he is a wise man who will not.” Benjamin Franklin

Ignorance is an empty cure for anger: You cannot be angry if you don’t understand the insult, never discover the betrayal, or simply aren’t aware of the social norm a person breached, but only because you are a fool. On the other hand, if you are well aware of a transgression, yet instead of becoming angry simply accept or fix it, forgive it, work around it, or merely find it amusing, surely you have the better part of wisdom. A mother who doesn’t notice her son stealing the extra cookie has been duped; if she sees nothing wrong with it, she is soft. The wise mother calmly turns the page of her newspaper, rolls her eyes, and says, “Put it back.”

“There are two things a person should never get angry at, what they can help and what they cannot.” — Plato

Perhaps Plato might have saved words if he had just said, “don’t get angry at anything,” but his serenity creed suggests a neat little decision tree: If what you’re angry about can be fixed, then fix it; if it cannot, then don’t waste energy on it. Ever the idealist, Plato exorcises the morality from anger, and reframes it as ineffectual problem-solving. This misses the point somewhat, from the angry person’s perspective: The angry truck driver knows that the existence of bad driving cannot be helped; he knows that the particular instance of bad driving he had to swerve around cannot be helped; but he will honk his horn just the same. He is protesting, not problem-solving. Plato’s aphorism shows this for what it is.

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 “How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.” Marcus Aurelius

How many times do I hear the same thing from couples? It started over the silliest thing.” The consequences of anger often so far outgrow their relatively humble origins that the original disagreement becomes almost a moot point. How many duels have been fought for the role of an eye, how many wars for an insult? “An eye for an eye,” believe it or not, was actually a humanitarian reform at the time, because the human universal is to return injury with interest (and then some). Anger is a biological doomsday machine and its consequences are designed to be more grievous than its causes. But so are the other guy’s. And therein lies the problem.

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 “It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness.” — Ancient Chinese Proverb

A beautiful image. Doing some small thing, anything, is better than simply whining and complaining, and this idea is neatly conveyed. But the image also hints at the ignorance of the angry (who are “in the dark”); the futility of getting angry (cursing does not “illuminate” the situation); and the irrationality of anger (it makes no sense to reprimand the darkness). The candle image is a happy contrast, and brings to mind the old Buddhist saying, “Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle without diminishing its life: Happiness is not diminished by being shared.”

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 “Keep cool; anger is not an argument.” — Daniel Webster  Au contraire. The “appeal to spite” is a logical fallacy with its own Wikipedia entry. Leonardo da Vinci remarked that “where there is shouting, there is no true knowledge.” The same applies today to the use of capitals and exclamation marks in text messages. Thomas Carlyle, the Scottish philosopher, astutely observed that, “in any controversy, the instant we feel angry, we have already ceased striving for Truth, and begun striving for Ourselves.” The bottom line, according to Desmond Tutu: “Don’t raise your voice; improve your argument.”

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“He who angers you conquers you.” — Elizabeth Kenny

This is nowhere better encapsulated than in Mohammad Ali’s famous rope-a-dope against George Foreman in the “Rumble in the Jungle” title fight. It is well known that he tired out his heavier opponent; it is less well known that he deliberately taunted him: “Is that all ya got? You have no punch. You can’t hit. You’re swinging like a sissy. You’re missing. Let me see ya box!” He was baiting the bear. Foreman, infuriated, continued to swing big taxing punches to the point of exhaustion and eventually became little more than a punching bag for the ever-ready Ali.

In my own life, at a smaller scale, I recall an incident in the 8th grade when we were shown a documentary on the planets during class. Breaking the monotonous narrative, a voice cried out, “Sir, is that Uranus?” I’m convinced that had the teacher merely rolled his eyes and said, “Very original…” or something of the sort, the boy would have felt embarrassed and piped down. But instead, the teacher fell into a rage, turning tomato red and dragging the boy out of the room by his collar. The teacher had been baited. Whatever punishment that kid received for his irreverence, it was surely worth it, for that teacher had revealed a weakness in our eyes that he would never quite live down.

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 “Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” — George Carlin

Of course, the idiot in question thinks you’re the maniac, and the maniac thinks you’re the idiot. Man (or woman) is the measure of all things. Anger is self-righteous. Angry individuals think they know the right way to do everything and drive everyone else mad in the process. The cure for self-righteousness? A good dose of philosophy, anthropology, and travel.

The Moirai (Moerae)-'' Decide Fates Or Person's Destiny''

The Moirai (Moerae), also referred to as the Fates, represent the idea of “destiny” in Greek mythology. The Ancient Greeks had a habit of creating deities to represent abstract concepts as a way of explaining their world. However, the Moirai do more than just represent destiny – they are the personification of it. It is understood that the Moirai controlled people’s lives in different ways from the time they were born to the time they died.

It is interesting to note that the word, Moirai, meant a portion or a part of a whole in Ancient Greek. The connotation here is that it referred to a portion of a bounty, as would be the case if people were to divide up a treasure. Thus, the Morai were seen as being keepers of a person’s destiny, or her specific allotment of life. Here’s more information about who the Moirai were and the role they played in Greek mythology.

Who the Moirai (Moerae) Were

It is largely understood that the Moirai, or the Fates, were three of the six children that Themis, the goddess of Justice, and Zeus, the king of the gods, had together. The other three children were the Horai, or the Hours. The names of the three Fates were Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos. They each had their own, unique characteristics.

  • Clotho. She was known as the spinner because she “spun” the very thread of a person’s life. She spun the thread from her Distaff directly to her Spindle.
  • Lachesis – Once Clotho spun the thread, Lachesis would measure it for each person. Each person had different lengths of thread, indicated that they all had different life spans.
  • Atropos – She was responsible for cutting the thread, which indicates that she controlled when life would end. She also chose the way each person would die.

As you can see, Clotho was always associated with the beginning of life. She essentially created it by spinning the thread. Lachesis controlled the length of a person’s life, and Atropos was always associated with death. Thus, the three Fates essentially represent Birth, Life, and Death.

The Appearance of the Moirai

Unlike their siblings, the Horai, the Moirai were always depicted as ugly old women. Note that the Horai were always depicted as young, beautiful women. The Ancient Greeks appeared to have feared the Moirai. After all, one of the Fates (Moerae) were said to have controlled every aspect of a person’s life, including their death. As a result, most Ancient Greeks feared them and as a result, they imagined them with unflattering appearances. They were also depicted as crippled, stern, inflexible, and severe. They were usually depicted together as a group of three and they were often depicted with their objects. For instance, Clotho was usually shown with her spindle and Atropos was depicted with her cutting shears.

The Moirai, also referred to as the Fates, were an interesting part of Greek mythology. They were three of the children of Themis and Zeus and they were always associated with a person’s destiny.

The Moirai (Moerae)-” Decide Fates Or Person’s Destiny”

The Moirai (Moerae), also referred to as the Fates, represent the idea of “destiny” in Greek mythology. The Ancient Greeks had a habit of creating deities to represent abstract concepts as a way of explaining their world. However, the Moirai do more than just represent destiny – they are the personification of it. It is understood that the Moirai controlled people’s lives in different ways from the time they were born to the time they died.

It is interesting to note that the word, Moirai, meant a portion or a part of a whole in Ancient Greek. The connotation here is that it referred to a portion of a bounty, as would be the case if people were to divide up a treasure. Thus, the Morai were seen as being keepers of a person’s destiny, or her specific allotment of life. Here’s more information about who the Moirai were and the role they played in Greek mythology.

Who the Moirai (Moerae) Were

It is largely understood that the Moirai, or the Fates, were three of the six children that Themis, the goddess of Justice, and Zeus, the king of the gods, had together. The other three children were the Horai, or the Hours. The names of the three Fates were Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos. They each had their own, unique characteristics.

  • Clotho. She was known as the spinner because she “spun” the very thread of a person’s life. She spun the thread from her Distaff directly to her Spindle.
  • Lachesis – Once Clotho spun the thread, Lachesis would measure it for each person. Each person had different lengths of thread, indicated that they all had different life spans.
  • Atropos – She was responsible for cutting the thread, which indicates that she controlled when life would end. She also chose the way each person would die.

As you can see, Clotho was always associated with the beginning of life. She essentially created it by spinning the thread. Lachesis controlled the length of a person’s life, and Atropos was always associated with death. Thus, the three Fates essentially represent Birth, Life, and Death.

The Appearance of the Moirai

Unlike their siblings, the Horai, the Moirai were always depicted as ugly old women. Note that the Horai were always depicted as young, beautiful women. The Ancient Greeks appeared to have feared the Moirai. After all, one of the Fates (Moerae) were said to have controlled every aspect of a person’s life, including their death. As a result, most Ancient Greeks feared them and as a result, they imagined them with unflattering appearances. They were also depicted as crippled, stern, inflexible, and severe. They were usually depicted together as a group of three and they were often depicted with their objects. For instance, Clotho was usually shown with her spindle and Atropos was depicted with her cutting shears.

The Moirai, also referred to as the Fates, were an interesting part of Greek mythology. They were three of the children of Themis and Zeus and they were always associated with a person’s destiny.

''Living On A Moment''

You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.

To live in the moment, or now, means being conscious, aware and in the present with all of your senses. It means not dwelling on the past, nor being anxious or worrying about the future.

When we concentrate our attention on the present we focus on the task at hand. We give our full attention to what we are doing and we let go of outcomes.

The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it.

Seizing each moment in life allows us to prolong its value and make it more meaningful. Rather than seeking quantity of time, when we live in the moment we enjoy and savor every minute. We don’t sacrifice quality for quantity.

Of course, this doesn’t mean we don’t need to plan, set goals or prepare for the future. We can do all of these things and still enjoy each moment as it unfolds.

For instance, if we have set a goal to exercise each day, we would carry on with it while enjoying the actual process, or moment, of exercising (or at least be in the moment of it).

When we train ourselves to live in each moment, we immerse ourselves in it and begin to discover its beauty and wonder. We learn to focus and how to manage our energy. Professional athletes understand and employ this kind of focus very well. They know that accomplishment and success are a result of the skillful management and balancing of energy.

To make every moment count we must embrace it. Everything we do and every person we come in contact with deserves our full attention. Even when resting we should savor the moment. It gives us the opportunity to recharge, renew and gain clarity.

Quite often we put huge expectations on ourselves and our lives. We rush to do this, hurry up with that, without actually enjoying the process. What’s the rush? Where do we think we’re going?

If we don’t stop and think about where we’re at, we’re probably missing the point. Instead, when we appreciate each moment and garner the lessons from it, we live consciously, purposefully and responsibly.

Likewise, when we live in the past and don’t let go of painful experiences, perceived wrongs, or difficult times, we condemn ourselves to a present and future of the same. We cannot change the past. We can, however, come to terms with it, know that it’s over, and move on.

Living in the present moment creates the experience of eternity.

Living in the moment means letting go of the past and trust in the future. When we are positive and optimistic in the present, we open the possibility of a positive and promising future. We owe it to ourselves to make every moment count – now!

Tips To Live On The Moment:-

  • Train your mind to focus on the current activity.
  • Engage in, and feel what you are doing. Enjoy the process.
  • Learn relaxation techniques in order to be present in each moment.
  • Take notice of your surroundings – sights, sounds, smells, ambiance.
  • Listen attentively to the conversation of others, music, even silence.
  • Savor your food and drink. Taste each morsel.